Potty Training - the Big Debate

I decided to take the softly, softly approach with Ollie. He had been taking a keen interest in the toilet for some time and enjoyed flushing it and anything he could find down it, so I decided to use this to my advantage. We started off with a potty just before he was two. I got him to sit on it - usually in front of the TV - each morning and evening just to "break him in". We would have some success but usually by chance rather than on purpose. I made a fuss of him when he used it but we didn't seem to make that much more head way.

Shortly after Ollie's second birthday James was born. The books seem to say not to try potty training when there is a big event. However, I decided we were down the road of potty training and didn't want to turn back! Also, we weren't out and about quite so much so it seemed to make sense. I then found that, for Ollie, climbing on top of the toilet seat was much more exciting than using the potty and this, plus a bit of bribery (a jelly baby for every successful visit) meant we made quick progress. Once I felt he was confident to ask to use the toilet, I stopped putting him in pull-ups when we were out and the nappies were history. Be prepared for bad days though. We still have days when Ollie simply seems to be too engrossed in playing and forgets and so spare clothes are still taken everywhere.

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We've started with Lauren to encourage her by offering treats if there are no more accidents and even withdrawing TV rights if there are!  I think the best tip has to be waiting until they're ready though...we left it until she was 2 and a half and we've had very few problems at all!!!

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We left training our son until he was two and a half which co-incided with the beginning of summer. We started by encouraging him to use the potty first thing in the morning and after bath time, basically any time he was changing clothes. After a bit of running round without a nappy outside and a trip to buy big boy pants, we started training in earnest. We just kept explaining and asking him if he needed to go through the day and got into the habit of going before we went out anywhere. We didn't use sticker charts, just lots of praise and made a point of telling Grandma and other friends how well he was doing when he could hear us! He was keen to use the loo too, although we kept the potty out because he could do it himself more easily.

There were a few accidents but he had it cracked in about a fortnight and was dry at night about five weeks after that. That was great but, after the novelty wore off, about four months later, he started having a lot more accidents when he got involved with a game he didn't want to stop. That got better again eventually and then he went through a phase of always wanting to use the potty and not the loo. It helps to have the responsibility of washing hands, flushing and turning on and off the light, I think. It all makes him feel like a big boy!

I think the big revelation was that cleaning up the mess isn't usually that bad. Wee is pretty easy to get rid of and even number twos are fairly self contained, so to speak! After those long nappy years maybe I'm a bit tougher but I even think three accidents a day is no more hassle than three noisy nappy changes!

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Get your child used to trying for a few minutes on the potty before you go out anywhere. Even if they say they don't need a wee there and then, they sure as hell will the minute you have driven to the end of the road! If they are used to having to do 'last minutes', you do not have a full scale battle on your hands whenever you want to go anywhere or have wees in the car!

Other than that, try bribery and corruption. The power of one sweetie is amazing!  I give him a sweet and a sticker to put on his chart and he loves it!  He went through a stage of refusing to try and have a wee so the sweets were briefly used for encouragement/rewards for trying. Works wonders!

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James was already starting to potty-train himself by going to the potty for poos for a long while before we decided to really train him. The big break through with James was to get him some 'big boy' pants and explain to him the difference between these and pull ups and that we needed to keep these 'dry'.  It was definitely perseverance for the first couple of days and not showing that you're upset or tired or frustrated. They need a lot of encouragement and understanding at the beginning with the new change. 

The star sticker chart didn't last beyond a two-day period for us, but after a fairly good week, we rewarded James with a choice of a new train for his set - just to reinforce that he'd been doing a good job (yes, not above bribery at the beginning to make sure he knows it's been a worthwhile effort!)  Also useful was 'showing' him (if you're not personally bothered by this) as then he began to see it as natural and that everyone goes to the toilet/potty. 

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We began potty training in earnest when my daughter was nearly three. The first two weeks can only be described as horrendous !! The problem was not lots of accidents but that she was able to hold her wee all day, resulting in one very upset and angry child and two very fraught parents. The poor girl used to hop around for hours, crying as if in pain, but could not be enticed to wee. We were so concerned she had a urinary infection we took her to the doctor - they tested a sample of urine and it was ok so we could relax a bit more. Despite her being physically ready to potty train, she also needed to be emotionally ready, and it wasn't until she realised the sensation of letting go the wee that we started to make progress and everything eventually calmed down.

I had read quite a bit about potty training beforehand, but I certainly did not expect this. Interestingly the health professionals we talked to didn't seem to think that this situation was very common and did not offer much advice, other than to try and be more relaxed about it all. However, several mums I know have had similar experiences.

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It's my opinion that you can try any method or system for potty-training you like but it will only work if your child is ready. Those who swear by sticker charts, sitting the child on the potty at half hour intervals, following Gina Ford's 'Potty Training in a Week' to the letter have, in my humble opinion, had success only because their child was ready.

As the mother of a late-starter, I tried just about every method under the sun with no success. Finally, at age three and a half, my son was suddenly ready and was trained within a fortnight.

Given the stress we'd had trying to get him there in the day-time, I made absolutely no effort to train him at night. He wore a pull-up every night for a further six months or so until I realised that he'd had dry pull-ups for a few nights in a row and decided to try without. He was dry the next morning. He happily takes himself for a wee in the middle of the night and we've only ever had one night-time accident.

I wish I'd ignored the pressure from other people to train him and been content to wait for him to be ready. I could have saved myself a lot of stress and hassle.

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I thought my daughter would never be ready. She didn't show any signs by the age of three so I just took her nappy off and after a few days it clicked. Plus I delegated the task to my husband! I think disposable nappies can just be too absorbent, even the "Feel & Learn" pants didn't work. Because of her age, we were able to go straight to the toilet as she was too tall to comfortably get on and off a potty so no yucky potties to clear out. My best tip is to keep a bottle of bubbles in the toilet. This was the best way of encouraging her to sit long enough.

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My daughter just literally potty trained herself at two years five months. I was hoping to have her trained before the arrival of the baby number two who was expected on her second birthday. Potties and seats appeared in both toilets, portable potty in the car boot, beautiful panties in the drawer and potty training books were read. However, Lydia refused point blank to sit on a potty and, when running without nappy, kept making puddles on the carpet without any remorse. Finally I gave up and decided to wait until the new baby was a little older.

As our baby boy arrived and grew, I had my hands full with him but the potties were still around and my daughter had nappy-free time before bath. Recently she surprised me once or twice by peeing on the potty all by herself in that nappy-free time. Then one morning I was, like often, busy getting myself and the baby ready for a toddler group, so it slipped my mind that the toddler dressed herself but couldn't put a nappy on. A few hours on, as I was sitting among other mums and feeding the baby, it struck me that my daughter, playing with other toddlers, looked very slim. Only then did I realise that she hadn't had a nappy for the past few hours! Quickly out came the portable potty and she peed into it on command! She has never worn a daytime nappy since.

I strongly recommend a portable potty ("Potette"). Unfortunately it is not environmentally friendly but it fits into a big handbag and my daughter loves it.

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My daughter is just two but has been potty trained for about six months. I had a potty in the bathroom from when she was really little and kept telling her what goes in the potty and then she would tell me it was wee and poo. She would then go and sit on the potty in the morning so I decided to take her nappy off in the morning and, hey bingo, potty training commenced. I found the transition from leaving her nappy off at home to getting her to wear knickers more tricky but have found rewards (stickers and treats) work wonders! Her nursery have also been very supportive and the other kids there are on their way to being trained as they also wanted to do wees on the potty too. I think you have to be led by your child when they are ready.

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Potty training was the only time I followed Gina Ford fairly rigidly with both my sons! First one was a little over two and a half, second was two and four months. We waited until they understood and could follow instructions and were likely to be motivated by a star chart. Once we had started, we didn't look back, ie it was nappies off for ever (apart from bed time). We didn't go anywhere for a couple of days and stayed in the living room with a potty close at hand. There were lots of accidents the first few days but it soon got better. At first we had to ask them if they needed a wee, to which the reply was inevitably no, closely followed by an accident! But they soon got to tell us when they needed a wee so we could get to the potty in time. The younger one moved onto the toilet fairly quickly whereas the older one liked using his duck potty so much it took a while to move on.